🌵 #exodus-logistics-chaos (Incident #EX-1300)

This thread is a follow-up to the main incident report: Historical Mismanagement: The Exodus Logistics Disaster

🧵 Thread: Logistics Postmortem — 40-Year Wandering

🧑‍💼 @moses.dev
📅 [Timestamp: Year 1, Desert Time]
“Route looks good on papyrus. ETA: Canaan in two weeks.”
🟢 Status: Confident

🗺️ @archon-routing
📅 [Year 1]
“Enabled ScenicRoute=true in GPS.yaml for spiritual enrichment.”
🚧 Note: Override locked by compliance

💧 @hydration.engineer
📅 [Year 5]
“Manna supply confirmed. Water provisioning still ‘faith-based.’”
⚠️ SLA breach reported by Tribe Ops

🪙 @aaron-uiux
📅 [Year 10]
“Design distraction emerged. Team now worshiping unauthorized gold artifact.”
⛔ Escalation pending review

📜 @prophecy-qa
📅 [Year 15]
“Tabernacle roadmap delayed—awaiting cloud pillar deployment”
🕰️ ETA: TBD

🪶 @celestial-HR
📅 [Year 20]
“Morale low. Frequent murmuring. Ten Commandments posted on internal wiki.”
📣 Mandatory spirituality training scheduled

🌀 @divine-devops
📅 [Year 40]
“Retry logic added. Exodus.yaml refactored for streamlined navigation.”
✅ Route to Canaan reopened

📣 @the-almighty
📅 [Year 40]
“Next migration: Jericho rollout. Please submit RFC before sounding trumpets.”