🚨 Miracle alert
Adler Hash: 517a0fc1
Incident: Unauthorized kernel patch deployed to vision module. User vision restored without standard approval.
Kernel Patch — Vision Module
Event ID: MIR-004-VISION
Target: Blind User ID #42
Patch Type: Saliva-based mudpack protocol
Applied By: Jesus of Nazareth
System Logs
[INFO] vision.driver[42]: status = null
[INFO] patch.init(method="spit + dirt")
[INFO] user.eyes washed in Siloam
[INFO] vision.driver[42]: status = restored
Slack Thread
Channel: #heavenops-support
gabriel
[09:01]
Anyone else see a patch go out to vision module?
uriel
[09:02]
Yeah, method was… unconventional.
michael
[09:03]
QA says user can see. Ship it.
raphael
[09:04]
Next time, submit a ticket first.
jesus
[09:05]
Sometimes you gotta get your hands dirty.
Postmortem: Uriel-404 Commentary
“Unusual deployment method, but effective.
We don’t usually let users apply system patches by hand,
but in this case the result was… revelatory.”
Status: Complete
Severity: Healed
Audit Notes: No rollback required