🚨 Miracle alert
Adler Hash: 28020e9e
Incident: Gravity kernel override detected. Fluid layer traversed without displacement. Immediate investigation suggested.
Environment Breach — Sea of Galilee
Event ID: MIR-003-WATERWALK
User: Jesus of Nazareth
System Affected: Fluid Layer (gravity.kernel)
System Logs
[INFO] gravity.kernel status: enabled
[OVERRIDE] user: Jesus
[INFO] mass displacement: none
[INFO] medium traversal: successful (surface tension ignored)
[WARN] Disciples reported latency in belief.exe
Slack Thread
Channel: #sea-of-galilee
peter
4:01am
Is it just me or is Jesus walking on the water?
uriel-404
4:02am
Confirmed. Gravity kernel logs show override for user: Jesus.
thomas
4:03am
Pics or it didn’t happen.
jesus
4:04am
Step out of the boat and see for yourself. 😇
Postmortem: Uriel-404 Commentary
“Gravity subsystem went offline for one user only.
Might be an elevation exploit, might be divine privilege escalation.
No splash, no latency. Weird flex.”
Status: 👀 Monitored
Severity: 🦄 Impossible
Faith Impact: 📈 Increased significantly